Thursday, March 29, 2012

This Missionary Life


This Missionary Life

- On Furlough



Tiredness sets in. My body is fatigued.

Yet I am encouraged. I am compelled to press on and keep my eyes on the prize.

Many talks, many questions, many friends, many meals, many miles.

Insightful advice, respectful probing, attentive listening.

Joyous songs of praise, laughter resounding, revolving door of hello and good-bye.

Feeling unsettled always, longing for the Highest place, but thankful for here and now.

Wanting to push on, knowing sometimes I need to pull back.

Ever forward, ever upward I strive to gaze.

Numerous international phone calls. Heart breaking with death and struggle of those left behind. Heart rejoicing with delight as I hear sound of brothers and family eager for me to return.

Deflation of spirit, momentarily, when those I seek counsel with beat me down and leave me feeling always the outsider. Turning to others I go, feeling encouraged by honesty of spirit and truth.

I am one. At times I wish I were many.

At times I seem put together. Often I am fallen apart.

Clinging to God. Sensing he is asking me to be bolder and freer, to live a life more radical and dependent on him.

A child of this universe, maybe. A child of the King, always.

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